Untitled
probablyharrison:

onlyhestandsthere:

T for tender

he opens the door on the fucking hinges side

probablyharrison:

onlyhestandsthere:

T for tender

he opens the door on the fucking hinges side

mom: what if your future husband doesn't like your favorite band then what
me: why wouldn't he like his own music mom

fuckyesquidditch:

theybuiltastauteofus:

I think I understand Quidditch more than I understand football.

I know I understand quidditch more than I understand football.

vegay:

eyebrows are really important

reillyinspace:

I was in line at target today just trying to buy some ice cream and this baby was screaming its fucking soul out. Anyways, the mom turned around and looked me straight in the eyes with the most monotone voice and said “birth control…. Use birth control…”

Positive alternative to “the walk of shame”:

whiskey-memories:

“Got Laid Parade”

“Stride of Pride”

“Post-Cock Walk”

“Just-Touched-A-Butt Strut”

“Took Off My Pants Dance”

“G-Spot Trot”

“Had Fun With the Clit, Time to Split”

Time And Relative Dimension In Space